Officially, though I see myself as working towards my future, I'm unemployed. Before this, I was a professional cook for five years. In whatever I do, I care too much, but is it about me, or the customers? I care very much about people, but it was my mother who raised me to be a high achiever. Yet, I've recently ripped away from my family. It's been almost a year since my mother and I spoke at all. The pressure I feel every day to have a positive impact, it's there either way. My mother also had no confidence in me. As embarrassed as I'd usually be admitting it, I'm still dealing with that. My birth father was gone before I was 3, and my step-dad struggled to be involved. So her beliefs were everything for me growing up.